6 Best Coaching Questions

This is from EXPONENTIAL (Book Excerpt)

Got a coach? Need a coach? Here are six great coaching questions from my friend Dave Ferguson...

There are from his new book: Exponential: How You and Your Friends Can Start a Missional Church Movement (Co-Authored with Dave's brother, Jon!)

1) “How are you?”

Remember at the heart of effecting coaching is a relational investment. It may sound cliché, but it’s still true: “People don’t care how much you know, until they know how much you care.” We begin every coaching conversation by checking in to see how the person we are coaching is really doing.

2) “What are you celebrating?”

Every meeting at Community begins with some form of this question. Often it’s stated like this: “Where are you/we winning?” Whether it’s a one-on-one meeting, a group meeting, a staff meeting, or a temporary task force, we begin by celebrating how God is at work in our life, ministry, and church. Moving from “How are you?” to “What are you celebrating?” keeps the tone of the meeting very relational and positive. It’s tempting to quickly focus on what’s not working or what is broken. This question keeps the conversation focused on where the leader is feeling successful.

3) "What challenges are you facing?"

You might be thinking, “Finally we get to something productive.” Yes, the previous questions are very relational, but if it helps any, remember that when it comes to coaching the relationship really is the task. This question gives your leader an opportunity to talk openly about the things that aren’t going very well in his group or team.

4) "How will you do about those challenges?"

Once a leader has disclosed some areas where he or she may be experiencing some challenges with his life, group, or team it is tempting to quickly move into “fix-it” mode and tries to solve the problem for him. There are times when a leader will need your insight and wisdom. However, the best way you can serve a leader is to help them tap into the wisdom and insight God has already given them to deal with whatever situation they are facing. It is the coach’s role to draw those answers or solutions out of the leader.

5) "How can I help you?"

Finally, the question we’ve wanted to ask. This is an important question, but if you never get to this question because the leader has already come up with an action plan as you walked through the previous questions, considers yourself an extremely effective coach. There are times when a coach needs to step in and offer whatever assistance is necessary to help a leader in need. One of the three tasks that flow out of the relational investment is “serving”, and one of the ways you can best serve a leader is to help them through a tough situation.

6) "How can I pray for you?"

The best way to wrap up a coaching conversation is to ask the leader how you can be praying for him. It is also a great opportunity for the coach to ask the leader to be praying for her. This is one way a coach can help the leader know that this relationship is mutually beneficial. After the leader has had a chance to express some areas where he is in need of prayer, take a few moments to pray for the leader and reassure him that you will be praying for him regularly.


The dream of God is not for the church to be led by a one-man show, but that it would be a great team led by great coaches. Our role is to equip and empower the people of the church to do the work of ministry. When the game is on the line and the final point needs to be scored, the ball will be in the hands of our leaders and those leaders need to be coached to take the winning shot.

To give full credit, you can also find this article here.

Ed Young's Lifestyle Debacle

Ed Young is in more trouble about his lifestyle and company… ahem, church expenses. WFAA in DFW is reporting about his lavish lifestyle and company expenses. He has issued a response through his public relations firm – no, not a joke – denying any wrongdoing and shifting the blame and focus from himself to WFAA.

If Ed cared about transparency, he would disclose everything. Instead, he is playing the PR game to transfer attention from himself to WFAA. In his public response during a Saturday night church service, he talked about his salary and home as if it was all proper. He never disclosed his salaries (church + $ generated from work for the church + royalties + etc.). His lifestyle is ridiculous and he could/should learn a bunch from Francis Chan about giving to the need. Instead, he lives a lifestyle of extravagance (7,820 sq. ft. home, 1.1 million dollar condo, 8 million dollar leased jet).

Many argue the point, but I agree that his lifestyle is a detrimental issue to his legacy and immediate influence. The problem is that money is a root of all kinds of evil. This situation is sad for The Church, and can undo so much good Fellowship Church has accomplished.

If he is innocent of any wrong doing and is truly above reproach, transparency is his option. If he is guilty, repentance and transparency are his options. Either way, he should man-up and let the truth of the situation set him free… after all, what should a role model for such a huge church have to hide?

The natural response is to ask me if I do the same thing as an associate pastor of a much smaller church; which I do not. However, my family still lives in a starter home, we drive Hondas, and thus avoid question generated from a lifestyle of extravagance. Also, the information about my salary (and any other staff member at my church) is fully and readily available to any church member who requests it.

Here is another post on the subject.

Cole's 2010 Mock Draft

1. Rams – Sam Bradford
2. Lions – Suh
3. Bucs –Gerald McCoy
4. Redskins – Trent Williams
5. Russell Okung
6. Seahawks – CJ Spiller
7. Browns – Eric Berry (if he falls here, it keeps them from making a stupid pick)
8. Raiders – Derrick Morgan (it wouldn’t surprise me if they take Classen, Tebow, or Bryant, I’m hoping reason wins out for this albatross of a franchise)
9. Bills – Bryan Bulaga
10. Jaguars – Rolando McClain (my guess is a TRADE here, if they can get a taker – Cowboys, PLEASE! – if so, Earl Thomas wears a star)
11. Broncos – Earl Thomas (if they draft Dez Bryant after trading Marshall, everyone in the organization should get fired)
12. Dolphins – Dan Williams
13. 49ers – Joe Haden
14. Seahawks – Anthony Davis
15. Giants – Jason Pierre-Paul
16. Titans – Kyle Wilson
17. 49ers – Maurice Pouncey
18. Steelers – Dez Bryant (really? After Holmes and Big Ben? I hope they take Tebow…)
19. Hawks – Brandon Graham
20. Texans – Taylor Mays
21. Bengals – Jermaine Gresham
22. Patriots – Sergio Kindle
23. Packers – Charles Brown
24. Eagles – Everson Griffen
25. Ravens – Terrance Cody
26. Cardinals – Devin McCourty
27. Cowboys – Bryan Bulaga (if they can trade up and get rid of Bennett or Carpenter, it’s a great night!)
28. Chargers – Ryan Matthews
29. Jets – Jerry Hughes
30. Vikings – Jimmy Clausen (my guess is he will be taken about 8-12 picks higher via a trade)
31. Colts – Jared Odrick
32. Saints – Brian Price

• I spent 15 minutes tops on my mock draft, but looked at other mocks more than once (before and during my mock)

• Although I am not a professional, I am sure I will be just as bad as Mel Kiper when the real results come in.

• During the Facebook/MySpace NFL Pro Football Picks challenge I was ranked #2 out of 112,274… which will mean nothing here, but at least I am finally letting the world know how awesome my picks were this year!

4 Constants in Family Bible Study by Mark Driscoll

From Mark Driscoll: I’m not a hugely formal student. I study a lot, read all the time, and in our family, things flex from week to week, season to season, and as the kids age. Upon reflection, though, four things are constant:

1.Lots of Bibles
We have tons of Bibles all over the house. We have Bibles for every age, lots of translations, and lots of formats. To be honest, if a member of my family finds a Bible they like that is faithful, I am not at all legalistic about which one they prefer. Most days, every room of the house has a Bible of some kind in it, ready to read.

2.A love of Bible reading
I love to read the Bible and want my family to love reading in general, and Bible reading in particular. It’s not a forced rule, but a fun part of life. Everyone in our family likes to read the Bible and does so daily. I’ve never made a rule about daily Bible reading, but we all do as a habit that we enjoy by God’s grace. We all read Scripture and pray at night before bed as a sort of wind-down wrap-up to the day and the kids like it a lot.

3.Life integration
Throughout the daily moments of life, the window of opportunity opens up to sit down with Grace and the kids, either one on one or as a group, to open the Bible and apply a particular portion to something happening in their life. As a parent and a spouse, it is a great honor to be on watch, appointed by God to capture these sacred moments of bringing Scripture to bear on a teachable moment.

4.Age-appropriate discussion We eat dinner together and have a Bible at the table that I use to lead discussions. We also keep a notebook of prayers for people and the kids really like seeing prayers answered and checked off. Some nights the family gets down some rabbit trail of conversation that is not overtly theological, and as a dad I don’t force a big theological discussion upon them, but rather follow the Holy Spirit as we just enjoy one another. Other nights we have some big theological discussions that I lead out of the Bible. After church on Sundays, since I’m still working, Grace is faithful to ask the kids what they learned in the service or their class and draw out of them what God revealed to them from Scripture. Anyone wanting to grow in this skill can read Big Truths for Young Hearts by Bruce Ware, in which he shows how to teach theology to kids in an age-appropriate fashion.
With our children (ages four to twelve), Bible reading really varies, but here is what is going on presently in our home:

Gideon (4) gets read a lot of Bible stories (especially at night) and asked fun Bible questions that I probably need to compile as a free e-book. I’ve done this with all the kids over the years as a sort of Bible Jeopardy for kids. He likes The Jesus Storybook Bible, The Beginner’s Bible, and The First Step Bible.

Alexie (6) is reading well so she reads to her mom and me from an age-appropriate Bible every day. No matter what, this includes snuggle time before bed, which is a big deal to her. She likes The Jesus Storybook Bible, as well as reading on her own from The Beginner’s Bible, and The First Step Bible.

Calvin (8) is reading well and has a good Bible for his age that he reads each day, and we discuss with him what he’s learning. He is enjoying Mighty Acts of God by Starr Meade, which is an age-appropriate book for him to read. Previously he read through The Jesus Storybook Bible on his own multiple times, and now he needs something a bit more suited for his reading level, so we’re trying other additional Bibles to give him some variety.

Zac (10) is reading through the New Testament right now in the New International Reader’s Version (NIrV), an age-appropriate version for him. He also is reading for fun from The Picture Bible, which is set up like a comic book. He also enjoys books such as Ten Boys Who Changed the World and Ten Boys Who Didn’t Give In, which are short biographies.

Ashley (12) read through the entire English Standard Version (ESV) of the Bible last year and is reading through the entire ESV Study Bible, including the notes, this year and so far has finished up the Pentateuch (first five books). She is an avid reader who reads a lot of fiction for fun, loves Christian biographies, and also has chosen to read through my new book Doctrine and write a report on it for school, which means the world to me. She keeps joking that one day she will be my research assistant and copy editor, as she’s a very gifted writer and we may have her start blogging for teenage girls and are praying it through.

Momma Grace and I are constantly reading and, it seems nearly every day, discussing what we are learning. Date nights and other extended times together are usually spent talking about people we are ministering to, the kids, and what we are reading and learning. This is pretty much a lifestyle for us that has been in effect for many years. We study very differently and so it works best for us each to study individually and then share together what we’re learning and discuss it. The Bible studies that had the biggest impact on Grace personally were on repentance and regeneration. She also loves the biblical counseling that comes from www.ccef.org, enjoys Carolyn Mahaney and has particularly enjoyed doing her Girl Talk study with Ashley, which is great for moms and daughters.

Lastly, I highly value reading. When I was a little boy, my mom took me to the library very often and helped birth in me a great love of books and learning. So, in our home we each have our own library. Every bedroom has a bookshelf with a small library for each family member. We have a small family reference library downstairs off the reading room, where there is good lighting, comfy seating, and a fireplace, and no technology resides (e.g., TV, computer, stereo). That family reference library has commentaries, Bible dictionaries, concordances, Bible background information, and so on to help anyone get basic Bible study done. My rule about books is that if it’s decent and you’ll read it, I will buy it. My personal library is pushing five thousand volumes in print and many more than that in Logos Software and other digital formats. The other members of my family have maybe a combined thousand or more books. It has taken years to collect them all, and many come from friends who donated them or used book stores, but, bit by bit, you can build a decent library and continue to encourage reading by making it interesting with lots of options and fun

Redefining Dumb: Rep. Hank Johnson on Guam

Georgia's Fourth Congressional District, Congressman Hank Johnson, "My fear is that the island will become so overly populated that it will tip over and capsize." In recent days he said that he was making a joke, the only reality is that his intelligence is a joke. Georgia, congratulations on your congressman representing you so well!

Born To Die