Book Review: Choosing To Cheat by Andy Stanley

Choosing To Cheat is not what it sounds like initially, it is about “who wins when family and work collide.” Throughout the book, Andy Stanley tackles the number one challenge in my life, which is also the greatest challenge in most men’s life: balancing our work-life and home-life, career and family, professional verse parental/spousal. The beauty of this book is that he does not merely address the issue, he gives easy to follow advice for how to deal with these steps.

While there are many helpful points, some are found is addressing the balance between work and family before it spirals out of control. Chapter Four (Picking Up The Pieces) provides a healthy barometer along with quality questions to ask your children to gauge how you are truly doing with your family.

Section 2 is the practical part of the book that provides a roadmap for how to make family your family your top priority. Through the life and dedication of Daniel, Stanley provides 3 simple steps to follow: Make up your mind, come up with a plan, and set up a trial. For me, chapter seven was the most helpful chapter. One of my favorite quotes came from that chapter on page 86, “Reprioritizing your world around your family is not just a good idea. It is a God idea. As a Christian, I don’t think I have any option when it comes to establishing my priorities.”

My reason for purchasing this book and reading it is a direct result of listening to Andy Stanley give the Pastors’ Q & A at his Drive 2010 Conference last week. He said this book was the most important one he has ever written. After completing it, I think he is correct. The only real critique I have of it is what he addresses as the book’s main problem in the introduction, the book’s title. Once he sets up the idea it does make sense, because every man is going to cheat on his job (for his family) or cheat on his family (for his job).

To be clear, I would recommend every father and husband take a couple hours to read this book, then spend your life altering it to do be the man at home only you can be!

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