Accountability Groups by Ed Stetzer

This is one of the greatest resources I have come across in regards to accountability groups. The one thing that must be understood is that accountability only works if you are honest! These is research from Ed Stetzer on the right questions to ask and can be found on his blog:

Typically, these questions are asked in groups of 2-3, are specific to men or women, meets regularly, and hold each other accountable.

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John Wesley's Small Group Questions:

1. Am I consciously or unconsciously creating the impression that I am better than I am? In other words, am I a hypocrite?
2. Am I honest in all my acts and words, or do I exaggerate?
3. Do I confidentially pass onto another what was told me in confidence?
4. Am I a slave to dress, friends, work , or habits?
5. Am I self-conscious, self-pitying, or self-justifying?
6. Did the Bible live in me today?
7. Do I give it time to speak to me everyday?
8. Am I enjoying prayer?
9. When did I last speak to someone about my faith?
10. Do I pray about the money I spend?
11. Do I get to bed on time and get up on time?
12. Do I disobey God in anything?
13. Do I insist upon doing something about which my conscience is uneasy?
14. Am I defeated in any part of my life?
15. Am I jealous, impure, critical, irritable, touchy or distrustful?
16. How do I spend my spare time?
17. Am I proud?
18. Do I thank God that I am not as other people, especially as the Pharisee who despised the publican?
19. Is there anyone whom I fear, dislike, disown, criticize, hold resentment toward or disregard? If so, what am I going to do about it?
20. Do I grumble and complain constantly?
21. Is Christ real to me?

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Wesley's Band Meeting Questions:

1. What known sins have you committed since our last meeting?
2. What temptations have you met with?
3. How were you delivered?
4. What have you thought, said, or done, of which you doubt whether it be sin or not?
5. Have you nothing you desire to keep secret?

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Chuck Swindoll's Pastoral Accountability Questions:

1. Have you been with a woman anywhere this past week that might be seen as compromising?
2. Have any of your financial dealings lacked integrity?
3. Have you exposed yourself to any sexually explicit material?
4. Have you spent adequate time in Bible study and prayer?
5. Have you given priority time to your family?
6. Have you fulfilled the mandates of your calling?
7. Have you just lied to me?

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Neil Cole's Questions:

1. What is the condition of your soul?
2. What sin do you need to confess?
3. What have you held back from God that you need to surrender?
4. Is there anything that has dampened your zeal for Christ?
5. Who have you talked with about Christ this week?

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The questions I use are from these cards from Church Multiplication Associates. I keep one in my Bible.

The ten questions are as follows:
1. Have you been a testimony this week to the greatness of Jesus Christ with both your words and actions?
2. Have you been exposed to sexually alluring material or allowed your mind to entertain inappropriate thoughts about someone who is not your spouse this week?
3. Have you lacked any integrity in your financial dealings this week, or coveted something that does not belong to you?
4. Have you been honoring, understanding and generous in your important relationships this past week?
5. Have you damaged another person by your words, either behind their back or face-to-face?
6. Have you given in to an addictive behavior this week? Explain.
7. Have you continued to remain angry toward another?
8. Have you secretly wished for another's misfortune so that you might excel?
9. Did you finish your reading this week and hear from the Lord? What are you going to do about it?
10. Have you been completely honest with me?

I Don’t Understand Parents Today

I don’t understand parents today, that’s right, I don’t understand parents today. Usually you hear stuff from my generation and beyond talking about how they don’t understand kids today. The age of entitlement has created kids who think the world owes them something, they live as though their parents are in debt to them for having them in the first place. That probably has not changed much in the past 20-30 years, what has changed is the parent’s response to their children.

If I would have entered into a conversation with my parents telling them how it was going to be, it would have ended with my loosing the usage of my (errr… their) car, a loss of extracurricular activities, and a solid grounding in particular. When it came to church events, I did not have much choice either. On the Sundays I wanted to skip church, I was met with a father “motivating” me to go or else, which was good for me. When it came to me wanting to skip a major event, my parents put their foot down and I went anyways. When it came to working on Sundays, it was not an option, neither was missing church for sporting events.

At the time I thought it was unfair and that my parents were out of touch. I thought I knew what was best for me and resented my parents for making me go to church, D-Now, camp, or whatever else. However, because of their insistence of my attendance, I understood that God was to take the primary place above all else. You could say they raised me in the way I should go, and as a result, today I have not departed from it.

Today, parents allow their children to dictate to them what they are going to do and my observation is that parents are okay with it. I have heard children tell their parents that they do not want to attend a church event because they would rather be at home, and the parents oblige their children’s desires, as if children know what is best for themselves. I see some of our students take weekend jobs and their parents are okay with it. I even hear parents make excuses for their children as to why they will forgo camp, D-Now, or church, that’s right the parents make excuses for their children to skip out on God’s church.

What I am really curious about is how these parents would respond if their children decided they did not want to go to school anymore. Would they say that their kids preferred to be at home so it was okay, or would they get their kids dressed and march them out the door? If a child said they did not think school was fun or beneficial, would the parents go along with that notion, or would they force them to go anyway? And the real kicker is this, why do Christian parents think educational development is more vital than spiritual development? Seriously, if it is okay to make your child go to school how is it any different to make them go to church?

What gets me is that the same parents wonder why their kids seem to leave God and the church when they leave home. Do the parents not think that their approval of their children skipping out when they were at home will lead to a greater rebellion when they are off on their own? Do parents not think that devaluing church and God as young people, will lead to an abandonment of God altogether when they become adults? Are they clueless, ignorant, or just out of touch?

Like I said, I just do not understand parents today!

Man Up by Mark Driscoll

Mark Driscoll on men acting like little boy's:

Online Accountability

The Internet can be/is a very dangerous place to roam. At the click of a mouse images can pop onto your screen and into your mind. Struggles can commence and send you spiralling into addiction that could a lifetime to undo. In order to prevent such tragedies and hardship from occurring, I would recommend that every person/home/church install bSafe online onto their computer. Bsafe is without question the best Internet protection software available. I used to recommend Covenant Eyes (and still do for Macs), but prefer bSafe online due to the proactive strategy that program uses to make it near impossible for one to view illicit images.

Bsafe has 36 Category Flexibility allows you to choose which categories (gambling, shopping, R-rated, alcohol, shopping, etc.) to allow or restrict access. They also included a Time-of-Day feature, which allows you to control Internet activities for specific times of day. This option will allow you to make informed decisions regarding your online access. A Tamper-Proof Reporting Option – Detailed reports show the time when the Internet was accessed, good sites visited, and sites that were blocked – is also included.

This program is so good, that it will often challenge you to rethink the websites you look at, as you will most likely have to unblock some websites you never think of as potentially dangerous (Facebook, some Blogs, Twitter, etc.). In spite of this, bSafe online is worth the frustrations that come when initially installed. The cost of the program is typically $49.99 a year, but with a Focus on the Family special, you can purchase the program 30% off ($34.97). Again, if you currently do not have any Internet filtering software, quit being stupid and protect yourself and your family.